Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Deep Thought: God Hurts

Today was the first day that I think I hurt one of my student's feelings. Through my discipline and classroom management, plus my best efforts to try and manage time and my run of our daily activities, I let it slip somewhere to be thoughtful and still give each of my students my undivided attention. When reflecting on my day, it occurred to me that the reason my student was sad at the end of the day was because I had done this to him all day...I had been harder on him than usual about his work habits and behavior, and had failed to recognize when he did things well or exceptionally. I also realized that I failed to call on him for ideas, didn't take a picture of his work when he requested me to, and really just...didn't love him well today.

And I am hurting so much because of this. I feel terrible that I have hurt him and have caused that pain in him. He is only 6 years old...where was the loving Father that lives inside of me? Where were my good intentions?

And then, in the midst of my sadness for causing him to hurt, I realized something huge. If I am this sad about hurting my student, I wonder how sad God is when he sees us hurting? I bet God really hurts and is sad when we hurt. I bet He feels terrible when He has to challenge us, push us, cause us pain. But, the difference between me and God is that He does it with the best of intentions. He does it lovingly, to stretch and mold us, to allow us to gain endurance, perseverance, strength. He allows us to go through trials in order for us to be more like Jesus. He loves us more than we can fathom, so much that He gave up his most prized and beloved Son to save us from ourselves and reconcile us back to I know that He must meet us where we are when we are hurting and be that strong tower for us.

It just blew my mind. I feel like God must feel when he hurts for his hurting children. But not even close to how he must hurt is just a breath compared.

Thanks, God, for allowing us to know and love you.

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